I am sitting in my favourite coffee shop, listening to Coldplay’s song, remembering about things while my half-desktop running for Criminal Minds. I like the movie a lot.
Not like the other day, my mind isn’t focus on the movie. There are a lot of things in my head, running like it’s the marathon route when actually it’s not. As always, I have this unspeakable question to myself; a questions I always keep asking and reminding.
I don’t know since when I have no capacity to talk about what’s on my mind. I see (too many) people passed by in my life when most of them are a blessing & important. Strange is, I can’t see myself show them how important they are to me. I abandon them. My ability to trust people fall down. I biased to see towards people.
No one’s fault but mine.
“Saying you’re happy isn’t the same as being happy.” – Quoted from Criminal Minds.
I can’t explain the length of happiness level I have now. I just feel like I am happy, but in the other way, the happiness itself drowned me into darkness.
As I told you, my life is in a strange stage now. I keep moving on day by day and be present, like my dad said. But somehow, manage yourself being able to stand up when all you wanna do is sit down are hard.
I know something bothering me now, I just don’t know yet what’s that.
While I writing this, I see a couple sit down tightly with coffee in their table. They smile. Are they really happy? Are we can define happiness as simple as smile on the lips? Are we can define sadness as simple as tears on the eyes? Well, universe is not that simple.
Or maybe.. complicated itself define the meaning of universe?